While most have resolutions, words, or goals on New Year’s Eve every year, my goal the last six NYE’s have been to remain sober in the coming year. I’m in the thick of motherhood and the stresses and being a wahm to three under four sometimes seem like it would be a hell of a lot easier (or more fun anyway)if I could just drink, or look forward to my old habit (drinking) to relax at the end of the day.The reality of that for me would likely end in my kids being taken away from me.
A lot of you (maybe you know me, maybe you don’t) might possibly be sitting there thinking, “I get through motherhood everyday without a drink. It’s not that hard”.
Kudos to you. Seriously. But you’re not an addict- so this isn’t a big deal to you. Your brain isn’t formed in the way mine is.
Think of YOUR brain this way:
A nicely groomed cornfield. Rows upon rows to walk up and down, to get from one side of the field to the other (navigating your day from start to finish). You’re able to “pick corn” at your leisure- as if the corn are healthy coping skills.
That ease, where you are able to pick up a healthy coping skill and continue on with your day, recoup after just yelling at your toddler to quit asking why, or accomplish simple tasks like the grocery store are something that don’t come as easy to me.
My cornfield is not groomed. It’s a field of corn with no rows. Every day, I have to take the weed wacker to retrain my brain (those clear as day rows for you) to turn to healthy coping mechanisms in those ungroomed rows. Because if I don’t, when that field is too hard to walk through- I will turn right back around and pick up a drug or drink.
I’m not discounting that motherhood isn’t hard for the normies or plethora of those with mental health diseases out there (hi, I’ve got those too). I guess I’m writing to let you sobermoms out there, you addict-sober moms, you ED moms, you warrior mamas, know I’m proud of you. I applaud your sobriety. Whether you have years or days, neither are easy in motherhood. I would be LYING if I don’t joke about drinking at least once every other day, and subconsciously think about it.
So cheers mamas! To another year of sobriety!!!! 💗
National Clearinghouse for Alcohol and Drug Information
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National Institute on Drug Abuse
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Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration
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